Day 6 (of 31)

So it's time for day 6 (two days in a row is good for me). I noticed that my day 5 post, posted on the date that I saved it and forgot to post it. So if you didn't see it, go back and look at it in my March posts. But hopefully, I will be better now about posting on a regular basis.

Today's post is really hard. I've been thinking about skipping it (or making up a new one). Forgive me that my final decision was to just go ahead with the original day 6. I promise I did not decide to do this because I want pity or to make anyone feel bad. Please remember that I have made peace with my life and what God has chosen to do with it. I guess before you go crazy, here goes:


Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day



This is my sister-in-law...and I only used her because she's the only one I have a picture of while pregnant. (sorry Tanna!)
I would trade places with a pregnant woman for a day. To feel a small human being kicking and moving inside my body would feel so miraculous. But I DO NOT have to have this experience to have joy in life. I choose to have joy in all things because it is God that is leading my life. He knows what's best (even when it hurts a little).

Venting

I just have to vent. There is only one thing that I am not liking about being an adoptive parent. It's not my daughter, it's not the things she does, it's not even where she's been in her life. The thing I don't like is the birth family...or some of them. No, it's pretty much all of them. My daughter is no longer theirs (the story is not important). We chose her, we wanted her, we've worked with her and been through hell with her (sorry for the language). So I get a little peeved when a birth family member thinks they have the right to try and brainwash my daughter or to try and "fix" what supposedly wasn't the birth family's fault. Ok, the past is over-with. The birth parents don't have legal rights, we do. I have the new birth certificate to prove it....so butt out.

I was asked today if when my daughter turns 18, if she's released. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN! Is it not the general rule that at 18, a child turns into an adult. Old enough to make their own choices. In a word they are "released". Why should it be different? Except that I know what was meant by that...."is she released to go from your child to our child again?" Hello! I do not plan on going through hell raising her and getting her to overcome her past, just to give her back to those who did this to her. I mean do I have "idiot" written on my forehead?

I'm sorry...I just had to vent. It's my mommy instinct. I am protective of my daughter. The only person I will share her with (besides Scott) is God. She belongs to Him first and foremost....and He gave her to us. TO US!!! Get it through your head. I love her as if she was from my own body. I want the best for her (even if she gets mad at us for decisions we make for her).

Adoption is a beautiful thing..I think it's miraculous. I am sure now that I would not do well with an open adoption. But if it was fully closed, I would choose to adopt again. It's all up to God.

I guess since we had prom last night I do need some sleep....cause I was the parent waiting in the living room dozing on the couch. I might be more upset because I'm tired. So I'll leave you with my venting and a promise that I'll post pics of prom and my beautiful daughter and her date (he seems like a pretty good guy).

New Song...again

Ok, yes I know I had a really long break (and I still have to continue with my 31 day thing). It's been a weird, strange week (and some odd days). But I have to share this song that I found tonight. I've heard this song before, but I've never really "heard" this song. Scott and I decided I need to add it to my song list (of songs I sing of course...lol). So it's now gonna be on the Stevens Park list. It's also on my playlest below..so enjoy!

We Can (by LeAnn Rimes)
They'll try to stop the dream we're dreamin'
But they can't stop us from believing
They will fill your head with doubt
But that won't stop us now
So let them say we can't do it
Put up a road block
We'll just run right through it.. Cause...

We can, do the impossible
We have the power in our hands
And we won't stop 'cause we've got
To make a difference in this life
With one voice, one heart, two hands, we can

They say the odds are stacked against us
But that can't hold us back, we will be relentless
There's a voice they're gonna hear
A voice so loud and clear
So let them say we can't do it, give us a mountain,
and we're gonna move it.. cause..

We can, do the impossible
We have the power in our hands, and we won't stop
Cause we've got to make a difference in this life
With one voice, one heart, Two hands, we can

We're gonna make a change today (make a change today)
Because we've got the faith it takes
To win this race, so let them say we can't do it
Put up a road block
And we'll just run right through it cuz..

We can, do the impossible
We have the power in our hands and we won't stop
Cos we've got to make a difference in this life
With one voice, one heart Two hands, we can

I can (oh I can)
Do the impossible (do the impossible)
I have the power in my hands, and I won't stop
Cause I've got to make a difference in this life
With my one voice, one heart, two hands, we ca

Day 5 (of 31)

Day 5, except that it should be like day....I don't know. Life got a hold of me...it got busy...and I kind of quit blogging (for the most part). I've had some issues that have had my attention. I've been worrying, stressing, and trying to cope. It's all good (and no I have not blogged about these issues). So I will start again with my 31 days starting with day 5. Here goes:

Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory




I have so many favorite memories. But I guess I'll say that my wedding day is at the top of my list. It's the day I married the best man in the whole world, and I've never regretted it. Even when times got tough. We are going to renew our vows at our 10 year anniversary, which will be in 2013. I can't believe that's only 2 years away. I can't wait to wear my wedding dress again, and make renew my vows publicly one more time. I fall more and more in love with this wonderful man everyday.

Day 4 (of 31)

Day 04 A picture of your night.


This is a picture of me sleeping with my puppy. This is what I do at night. My puppy, Spencer always sleeps with me. He's my baby, and he's way too spoiled. My big german shepherd, Krissi, will sometimes lay with me in bed, but not often....only when Scott's not in bed.

Day 3 (of 31)

This one was hard, because I have a few favorite shows.

Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show
Umm.....let's see. I have a few favorite shows...I'll narrow it down to three.



Saved By the Bell


Full House


NCIS


Ok, I cried when she died on the show (not the actress) and I miss Kate. She was replaced by Zeva. As of this weekend I got further in the shows, and now there's another character change that literally made me cry. I'm totally way too addicted.

Heaven is for Real

I read a book last night and this morning. It amazed and excited me. I reccomend it to everyone to read. The title of my post is the title of the book.

It's about a little boy of almost 4 years old who has a ruptured appendix and goes to heaven while during surgery. His dad wrote the book and shared what his son told him in the year or so after this event happened. The details the little boy gives are just amazing. He's so young to know some of these things...but there is scripture to back up pretty much what he says about what he saw in Heaven.

I won't share everything of the book, because you just have to read it. And it's a very simple read that is so full of child-like faith.

To read about what was seen in Heaven...the way he describes things. I understand my family doesn't want to lose me, and deep down I don't want to leave them...but I'm so ready to get to heaven. The little boy talked about seeing loved ones, seeing some kinds of animals (including dogs...I was glad about that) and described God and Jesus...even Jesus' cousin (John the Baptist).

What really got me was this boys mom had a miscarriage in between his sister and him (at 2 months along). His parents never shared this with him. He told them one day that he had met his other sister and that she looked like the mom. She was excited to see him and waiting for everyone to get there. But that because she died before her parents knew her gender or anything, she didn't have a name. This is my promise to see my children in heaven! Hallelujah!

This just proves that heaven is real, that God is real. To deny it is just plain ignorance.

Do you know that you will get to this place called Heaven? Do you question at all? I suggest that you find God, accept Christ's gift of eternal life so you can spend eternity with Him and with me (and my family).

I guess all there is left for me to say is...."Amen".